Unrealistic Expectations

This post will draw criticism probably - but I need to write it down.

I realistically don't believe that I've ever been in love. I've faked it, just like I've faked an unhealthy amount of orgasms and I've been infactuated to the point where I've believed I might be in love - but I've always put unrealistic expectations on the other person as "signs" that we should be together.

Case in point. This is what my ideal guy is and will do. He will be 8-10 years older than me, graduated from High School with some technical education - preferrably in construction. He'll be stocky, have blue eyes and at least one tattoo. His shoulder span will be larger than me, but I will be as tall, if not taller than him in heels. He will be a breast man (because that's the best feature I've got going for me). He will have a bit of a receeding hairline and keep it shaved a bit.

What he will do within the first two months of meeting me ... upon meeting me, he will tell me that I have gorgeous eyes and a great smile (I had braces twice, damn right I have a great smile). He should send me flowers - ideally (but not a qualification) after one of our first dates but a mandatory after the first time we have sex. He won't be that into PDA - but he will kiss me in public and after one too many drinks, he'll put his hand on my waist.

And that is Mr. Perfect for me. I have never dated a guy that did the actions, but have dated a handful that have looked similar to the description, I usually settle for some of the qualifications - realizing that this is probably a bit too unrealistic. But here's the thing, maybe it's not.

To me, the looks are about 25% of the equation, the actions are what will sell me on him and that's the part that has never existed, perhaps I should search based on that. The truth is that I may have seen too many movies, but looks don't matter at all - the whole sweep me off my feet matters more.

Now, besides the creepy might-be-a-pornstar and the fact that I completely realize he's a player, Mr. D is close to the qualifications. He's short and stocky and that's about it in the looks category. The first time he met he said he couldn't believe how beautiful my eyes were, we kiss in public and after too many drinks, he guides our walks with his hand lightly behind my waist. He's close, but not all the way there and I can't figure out for the life of me if he's serious or not (I'm leaning to the point that he's looking for a quick blow job and a roll in the hay with someone much his junior) - but it's something I will let play out.