I was involved in illicit behavior last night and it made me realize, that I miss certain elements of a non-illicit behavior relationship.
On the ride home from our annual family ski trip, my sister's boyfriend texted her to make sure she was okay (we were supposed to get a blizzard), I looked over and I saw this little smile, that kind that reminds you that someone would miss you if you weren't home.
I got a text a short time later from OF, telling me the weather was bad and to drive safe. I got that same little smile, but not in the same since.
A couple of hours of banter led to me relaxing in a hot tub and contemplating whether I should drink a glass of wine or spend the afternoon in illicit passion and great conversation. I toweled off with out the wine, cozied in my bath robe with the Bumpkin on my lap and watched the end of the Badger game, staring at my phone ever so often to examine the latest of messages.
I finally opted for the second option and headed over to OF's for a little fun. After we got done messing around, we were laying on his bed 1/2 naked and talking, one of my newly dark brown curls fell gently on my eye and he tucked it away behind my ear. I realize I miss that too.
We talked for a couple more hours in between messing around and I it was nice to just be with someone intimately and laugh and joke. I realized I missed that too.
On my way out to my car I fumbled with putting my bra on, he laughed and asked me to come near. He hooked it for me. It was this weird level of comfort and intimacy rolled into a few moments, those moments that happen ever so often with a significant other that you forget to treasure. While I miss the moments, I don't miss the fact that now I don't let them go unnoticed.
I opened the door to my car and pushed my knit cap over my curly hair and ears, brushed off the 4 hours of powder and for a moment before I pulled out of his drive I thought about those moments and wondered if OF could maybe be a BF. Through his window I saw him open his computer and scratch his head, I realized that couldn't be my boyfriend - he was just what he would always be, an old friend. But I also realized that I miss those little things and should probably be looking for a more substantial relationship as well.
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
4 comments:
Now who is OF? That one doesn't sound farmiliar. He has a hot tub though? That's pretty cool.
He's an old friend from like 4 years ago that I just make out with on occasion, though not frequently until lately.
And I have the hot tub, not him :)
Damn, you have a hot tub! That's so awesome, color me jealous :)
Don't know if this is the same but I broke up with a girl a few years ago and I really missed the way she rubbed my balls.
Post a Comment