Monday, February 12, 2007

A slight concern.

There are three major reasons a relationship doesn't work that all have to do with compatibility.

The first reason is personality compatibility.

The second reason is lifestyle compatibility.

The third reason is a combination of both.

In the light of my & BG's date last night I've been pondering this thought. In all sense, BG is basically a skinner, taller version of my rocker ex. They are both in bands, both audio engineers, both into a more "rock & roll lifestyle," both dependent on roommates for financial support. The key to the next step for me is to understand if the rocker and I didn't work because of our personalities, our lifestyles or the combo package and make sure BG doesn't fall into that same category if I'm going into this scientifically safe.

I believe Rocker & my lifestyles didn't fit and that was the main reason for the break up. I grew up in our relationship, graduated from college, went from roommate to living on my own, got a full time job, believed in monogamy - he didn't. He waked & baked, was single when the band played their gigs, lost his job and never got another one and maintained living in a house with 4 guys at the age of 33. We actually clicked personality wise which is what made me stay so much longer than I should have.

I'm afraid that BG is the same person in a different form. I know he occasionally enjoys a joint or two during practice, he plays 2 gigs a week and has no want to move from his 2 roommates place. But on the other hand, he's college educated so he's got that one up on the old one.

It's times like this where I wish RS and I had just maintained a friendship and not become FB's because his inside knowledge would help ...

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

You can't make people change the fundamental aspects of their personality MG, no matter how much you want to. If BG is not living the kind of life you want for yourself, you had better realize that the only way he will change is if HE wants to change. If I were you I would just lay it all on the table and tell him what kind of life you really want, and ask him if that's what he wants too. And if you think he's just saying what you want to hear so he might have someone to keep his bed warm for the rest of the winter have the courage to admit it to yourself.

Anonymous said...

Happy Valentines Day!!!!