I will be classier. I said. I will take time for me - to the gym over the lunch hour! I said. I will stop the affair. I said.
Five days in and I've gone to the gym twice over lunch, still packed in 28 hours in 3 days, and couldn't find the spine to say no to dinner with my mom because I'm exhausted (I'll get to that point in a second).
And because I'm exhausted, I went to work in jeans, tennis shoes, a sweater and a baseball cap. I didn't even shower. That's not classy at all.
And I'm exhausted because (if you couldn't tell from the last post) I went to Madison last night. As I drove I told myself it was the last time, so what if it was just one more? I can walk away after this. It's like his dick is meth or crack (which isn't funny I know, but damn that thing packs a punch). I tried, I really did, not to go - but he draws me in like a moth to a flame.
Sex, sex, sex. It's all I was thinking about. The kissing, the cold wall with my warm body against it, the groping and ripping off of clothes. I spent Wednesday night trying to calm my nerves myself, and after an hour and a half I just gave up. Then the texting started yesterday.
Everything was telling me not to do it - a friend called me about a class at 8:00, so I'm bantering over text while trying to rearrange our schedules. Then I agreed to go, his roommate was headed out for the night, and I get a call from my dad's girlfriend freaking out that she hadn't heard from him (he has shingles and got diagnosed with a bad infection) and she wanted me to see if he was okay (my brother and sister live next door, I live 1/2 an hour away - why me?) so I'm calling my brother trying to get him to go next door and see, all while blow drying my hair and putting on clothes after my angry-girl bath. At 9:40 I call my brother back, he hadn't even gone over yet! I insisted he go there now and paced the floor for another 10 minutes, then - giving up, I got in my car and started to drive to Madison. My sister called shortly after to say all was fine, I called his girlfriend back, to which she promptly told me that he had called after she got off the phone with me (an hour and a half earlier than the conversation we were having I might add). 1/2 way to Madison, the exits were closed due to a bus turnover, I got lost but still found my way back to the express way.
I arrived at 10:50, got naked, got off and he had an "IT" episode three times. I assured him it was nothing, he looked apologetic. I tried to leave and he grabbed me close. We talked like we normally did. Nothing was different, I was still confused.
So much for those resolutions - hey, there's always next week. And Darth, no talk back - I read your post on resolutions! :)
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
4 comments:
I can't believe you're still seeing a guy who blew off your birthday just a week ago. I need some of those pherimones he's got, the ones that get girls to completely abandon all their pride and common sense.
I'm not saying it wasn't a pathetic move on my part ... it was a moment of weakness I definitely need to work on.
Haha, I wouldn't say it was pathetic by any means. You loved the experience and feel of it all, and probably will always love a part of him. There's no shame in that. What you need to accept is the fact that you can do do plenty better than a guy who doesn't care about you unless your naked and right next to him. You can't make him be what you want him to be, and giving up your charms to him whenever he asks weakens his respect for you rather than strengthens it.
I can't believe you kill almost three hours and a tank of gas to bang some guy with a tempermental wiener. I know there are plenty of cocks in your zip code.
Post a Comment