Blogging from HOME!

So I might be stealing - a little. But until the security deposit from the old place is returned, stealing it will be.

Alright, so it's been awhile, shame on Milwaukee Girl. And you've missed me - maybe. So let's try to recap the last week and a half with out boring you ...

Last Sunday started out bad - so I should've figured it would stay that way, but optimistic me saw the sun above the clouds and kept thinking "this is it! I'm outta here!" At 7am my little bro was supposed to help me move; however, when I called his piss-tired newly 21 year old butt told me off. So I went to pack by myself. I got a couple loads over by 10am, a decent amount of cleaning and I called him again. He finally agreed in exchange for drinks and the game - of course, I miscalculated my time and that left him the effort of one box into E's truck and off we went to the BFs. When the BF called at 11:30, I told him my frustration and being the sweetheart he is, he said after the game he'd help me out.

So it was off to the brand new sports bar - Fanatics - in the third ward. It's any sports fan's wet dream, the guys did such a nice job. Equipped with pool tables, dart boards, an arcade room, a tournament room, over 20 TV's, a lounge-y area and a bar, you really can't say no. It was their very first weekend and R graciously came to check it out - being that she is the largest female sports fan I know.

Of course, the BF was in love with the bar. Excited by the new surroundings and amazed that R was out - he told me he'd be staying for the Colts game. Nice. Pissed and my brother saying he was bored, we packed up and left before the game was even over for the Pack.

At about 5:30, and at the urging of R, the BF called - "Sweetie, do you want me to help you?" Me? "Nope, I got it - enjoy the game."

At 7:00 while trying to get up the energy to go up and down stairs for the 100th time he showed up, "I thought you needed help." And in the next 1/2 hour we knocked out bringing 4 pieces of furniture, 5 trash bags and an old light to the garbage - got the truck and the pontiac set. He kissed me, telling me I needed to relax and we should bowl with NG & his girl.

We got home and, as always, NG and his girl were running late. He offered me a shower and laid in his bed to watch the game. I came out and nature took it's course - talk about a guy's wet dream - sex and football. Upon being lazy, we neglected to get dressed until NG and his girl came pounding up the stairs. I threw on my jeans to protect my man's naked body and stopped them at the top. They were insanely drunk.

So it was off to the bowling alley. Exhausted I really wanted to go home but they were having fun. That is WERE. Until NG's girl was on her 9th shot and so was he. When she's drunk, she's emotional. When he's drunk he's a jealous ass. Regular bowling antics left her in the bathroom crying, me stressed out from the scenario - NG trying to fit a guy that had him by a foot and 200 lbs, his girl running out of the bar - me chasing her in the rain. Our good friend feared for her safety and kept his eye on her. One more round in the bathroom I urged her to leave NG. That's when the last thing I thought I would hear came out of her mouth.

"I need to tell you that the BF has cheated on you."

What? Wait? Huh?

I gathered her up, piled NG into the car with her, looked out the window all the way home. Pulled away from his trying-to-comfort touch, somewhere between insane pissed off-ness and wanting to burst into tears. A million things went through my head -

She's drunk
When could he have cheated on me?
Well, I was in Vegas.
But we text messaged the whole time.
And I don't see him on Wednesdays and Thursdays because he has the kid.
And he does disappear when we're out and I often find him outside on the phone.
But he tells me it's his ex.
But then again, that's what he's telling me.
She's drunk.
She doesn't lie when she's drunk.
Why wouldn't she tell me before? Oh yeah, because she's a leach and so is her boyfriend, so they obviously needed a place to stay.
How could he do that to me?
I just want to go home.
I just want to cry.
But I do want to know.

It was raining, pouring, when we got home. I said I'd take her with me, but the cars were full of stuff. So I carefully emptied the Pontiac's front seat, warding off any help the man I thought I was falling in love with was offering. "I can do it!" I finally snapped.

"You're tired and over extended, let me help."

"Just go get her. It's almost done."

He emerged from the house, confused at everything. She got naked in the livingroom and just walked into NG's room and passed out. Looks like she isn't going home with me. I went back in the house to urge her to come one last time, but it was helpless. I went to the porch, followed by the BF. "MG - what's wrong? We all need sleep. You need to go home and sleep. But I need to know what's wrong."

I got out a cigarette, lit it under the cover of his porch. Took a deep long drag. I watched the smoke come out of my mouth, shivering. I took another.

"So how long have you been cheating on me? And how many times?"

I couldn't even look over at him, the words coming out of my mouth sickened my stomach. "What?! I haven't ... where is this coming from?"

"She said it. She said she's seen it, she's heard it, she's met them."

"But I haven't. I swear, I haven't had sex with anyone since we've become boyfriend & girlfriend."

"A. it isn't just sex and B. I can't do this again."

"Listen, MG, really - I haven't. I did, I mean. In the beginning. When we first met. And then there was the six weeks, but we reconnected. And since that night you slept at my house - I haven't."

"I can't do this again. I just can't."

"But I didn't do anything! I swear! I haven't had sex with anyone but you!"

"It isn't just sex. I'm invested in this - Christ, I was single for 4 years because I couldn't trust anyone and now, now, this?"

"You're not listening. I didn't. I haven't. I know it's not just sex. And I know your past, and I wouldn't do that."

"I have to go home."

"Yeah, you should. You need rest."

"Are you kidding me? I'm not sleeping at all tonight."

The cigarette was soaked as I walked out into the down pour, still holding back the gapping sobs that were diligentely stuck in my throat.

"Heroes tomorrow at my place?" He tried to beckon me one more time from his porch.

"Probably not." I shut the car door and plugged in my phone since it was beeping "LOW BATTERY." I turned on the lights and I couldn't hold back any more. It hurt so bad.