I did it at 11:00. I needed a new jacket. That was why. And while there, I got the perfect break-up outfit too.
Although, I should have taken Bella's advice and made like a band-aid I feared my family's reaction to not having him around or any him for that matter. I just wanted to fake happiness for one day and I did, except I confused it for the real deal. Tired after 3 Thanksgivings yesterday, I slept next to him. It's been over a week since I've done that. His body is so warm, so lovely.
And then Nic called, but not for normal Thanksgiving chit-chat, to let me know that he was still active on Match.com.
For the life of me, I wanted to believe that I was good enough. But I'm not. Not for him at least. So me and my shattered heart are leaving.
Tonight I'll put on the new jeans (that actually fit) and the new shirt and I'm going to tell him that I can't do this. I can't be good now, because that means at some point I won't be good anymore.
The tough part is I was actually IN LOVE with him. That, my lovely folks, is why I don't date. I don't like this part. The part where I want to crawl in a ball or scream and ask why I couldn't be good enough.
At least I'll look good while trying.
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4 comments:
Good for you. I like the concept of a break-up outfit!!
Very nice. Be thorough. Lay it all out there. Find out about the Match activity too! Be strong kid!
I found your blog through md's blog. I have been reading but haven't commented yet. I am going to be very rude and tag you in my first comment.
Post 7 Random Things About Yourself.
Thanks.
I also have been reading without commenting- do enjoy your blog very much though! Hope the break up went ok, and you looked and felt stunning in THE outfit! x
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