Mutha' Fucka!

Last week was a huge shock … a letter from the ex. Nothing like that to shock you out of your system. It’s been three years since we were in our five year relationship, young love – wasn’t it sweet? Yeah, until the stupidness of puppy love sneaks in your door and pisses all over your carpet.

You see young love led to co-signed credit cards and trying to forget led to more debt and more school loans, in the hope to never again turn to a guy for satisfaction. And then it arrived, an invitation to my entire family – sans myself – to his wedding.

It had been five years since I had even saw him and staring at my face was his new beginning and I was stuck in my same single life, same low-income, same routine, same cat, same everything. I admit, somewhat out of anger and somewhat out of jealousy, I sent him the credit card bill I was paying – after all he owned the Playstation One and Two, the Game Cube, the Xbox, the millions of DVDs, the big screen TV, the stereos, the appliances, the Cds and all the others. He sent me a letter saying pay or he’ll sue.

I sent him a letter saying go ahead, he sent me a letter back saying he’d retain a lawyer I owe him $4550.00 – for all the debt he incurred during our relationship. In case you didn't know - in Wisconsin it's 50/50 when you sign on the dotted line.

So that's the deal with the ex. I recently gathered all the pictures of him and fearing a rather large fire of 5 years worth of pictures, opted for the garbage disposal instead of matches. Ah, life is great when you can smash someone's face by lots of blades and not have to worry about criminal action.