Saturday, November 04, 2006

A bit of honesty

I might delete this post, as I'm sure I'll try to convince myself I am wrong.

I slept with RS last night. It was great - we talked a lot. He threw in a little jests about ex-girlfriends, etc and it weirded me out. I wasn't really sure what I thought until this morning.

And I've alluded to this fact a couple of times, but I'm completely in love with RS. I have been for 4 years. I've seperated myself enough that I'm not the psycho girl that's pawing at him for a relationship, but if I'm honest with myself I know that I want to be with him.

And CB is a lot like RS was when we met, and I think that's why I'm dealing with all these crappy situations because I want CB to be RS.

The fact is that CB is not RS and RS and I will never be. This sucks.

I want to be in Iowa right now! :(

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