Thursday Thirteen - Things you learn when you're broke!

How is it Thursday already??



1. That meat is a great feast since you can not afford it.
2. 108 ways to cook ramen noodles.
3. If you are broke yet hungry and thirsty a popsicle will suffice to fit both needs.
4. Stale cigarettes and coffee will make a great meal. Smile and enjoy it.
5. "Yesterday's fashion" has to be todays, accessorize accordingly.
6. Beer will work for a buzz because it's affordable. After drinking it for awhile you will also start to enjoy it.
7. A great way to have the effect of candles without having to pay for them is to use that hot plate your grandma sent you in college and burn away the last remaining wax in the old candles.
8. It makes sense to own 38 pairs of underwear since laundry is so expensive and febreeze can help get that scent out for all other clothes.
9. If you have to pay for heat and can't do it - lots of comforters come in handy.
10. The outdoors is a gym (except in winter - I do live in Wisconsin)
11. Driving is a pleasurable experience and it's okay to go slow - it'll burn less gas. Just leave 1/2 hour early.
12. Find a penny, pick it up (only if it's heads up though)
13. Broke sucks.


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The purpose of the meme is to get to know everyone who participates a little bit better every Thursday. Visiting fellow Thirteeners is encouraged! If you participate, leave the link to your Thirteen in others comments. It’s easy, and fun! Be sure to update your Thirteen with links that are left for you, as well! I will link to everyone who participates and leaves a link to their 13 things. Trackbacks, pings, comment links accepted!

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Stolen from BZ

1. HAVE YOU GOTTEN LAID IN 2006?
No. In fact not even in 2005.

2. EVER HAD SEX IN A PUBLIC PLACE?
My favorite place to do it - if he can't get you off in the bedroom the outdoors, the baseball field, the local bars - will get you off!

3. EVER LAUGH DURING SEX? IF SO WHY?
Yes. Because I didn't know he was inside, he had to inform me he was.

4. EVER CRY DURING SEX? IF SO WHY?
No, no, no!

5. DO YOU LIKE TO CUDDLE AFTER SEX?
Ummm - only if it's an all day sex session.

6. EVER REGRET SEX WITH SOMEONE?
Yes, yes and yes.

7. EVER FAKED AN ORGASM?
I should get an Emmy for my performances.

8. DIRTY TALK, OR SHUT THE FUK UP?
Shut the fuk up and hit me from behind!

9. EVER HAVE UNPROTECTED SEX?
Yes. Probably not smart.

10. EVER MASTURBATE TO YOUR FRIENDS SIGNIFICANT OTHER?
No way. Not even to my significant others when they were around. This is ME time :)

11. EVER HAVE A ONE NIGHT STAND?
Two attempts - but ended up doing it more often.

12. HOW BOUT A 3-SOME?
Nope!

13. EVER WATCH PORN DURING SEX?
Oh yeah - baw chica bow wow.

14. EVER THOUGHT OF SOMEONE ELSE DURING SEX?
Almost every time!

15. HAS THE CONDOM EVER BROKE?
Oh yeah - thank god a kid didn't come from it, they'd be UGLY!

16. WHAT IS YOUR MOST EMBARRASSING SEXUAL EXPERIENCE?
Seeing an uncircumsized penis for the first time - I told him to put it away. Poor guy.

17. HOW OLD WERE YOU WHEN YOU LOST YOUR VIRGINITY?
16 - during a Packer game.

18. WHO WOULD YOU LIKE TO HAVE SEX WITH RIGHT NOW?
There are so many ...

19. DO YOU THINK THAT number 18 IS POSSIBLE?
Hmmm - I'm not sure.

20. ARE YOU HORNY NOW?
No - trying to work (and obviously very hard)

21. WOULD U HAVE SEX WITH THE PERSON THAT POSTED THIS?
BZ is pretty hot ...

Happy Girl

So I've had a feeling a friend and ex of mine should meet (#3 and then #1 for those original readers) should meet - it turns out I was right!

Tonight we went out to celebrate my newly job-free friend's interview and I convinced her to go to shit town and meet #1/3. They hit it off grand! I was so happy because I wanted to see him happy. Previously I believed I'd be a bit jealous if they did get along - but it turns out I was elated! He's too much like me to give it another shot and she's enough like me but particularly different in the ways that drive him crazy. I really could not believe I'm so elated! I hope they go out ...

:)

Happy Birthday America

It's the 4th of July, fireworks are popping, brats and burgers sizzling and family get togethers dreadfully slugging along. Well, at least that's our fourth of July.

I have found that being 26 has not dawned on my family - for good reason. (A) I have no boyfriend and have not had one for 2 years, which instantly has brought me back to pubescent status in the eyes of my family (B) I live in my dad's basement, as a pubescent teen would and (C) I still do not make enough money to provide for what normal "adult" people would. I was relieved to find that no one asked me today about my relationship status, not even hinted. Though there were a few glances and whispers as for relatives to inform each other that I was, in fact, the eldest daughter and had not seen a penis in a near 6 months (perhaps not the last part and more likely my paranoia). I have in fact realized that it is no longer just my friends, family and apparently, ex-classmates that I hated in high school, that pity my status but also mother nature herself.

In somewhat of a buzzed state, at least I'd like to believe, I was informed by my mom that she saw my ex at Summerfest on Friday and she delightfully squealed that he had nearly doubled in size - including having two chins. This was followed by the brash statement that his wife was also quite overweight - similar to my size.

EXCUSE ME? Similar to my size and overweight in the same sentence is not an ego booster for someone who is going to the gym and doing an hour of cardio just to maintain, not to mention weights and what not. Was I supposed to gleefully laugh at this? The man who had not only stolen 7 years of my life and sued me had a wife "similar to my size." I don't know of a single ex-female to a man that wants to know that their current partner is similar to them. I do believe that if a girl does a dude wrong that the next female should be phenomenally gorgeous and if the reverse happened and he did her wrong, ridiculously ugly. Either would suffice for me; however, I have seen pictures of his wife and thought she was a lot bigger then me - so this is not a smiley face conversation. But I digress.

Back to family happenings and the view of me being pubescent and not a grown woman. At the family gathering, which I was forced into because it was sure that I would not have anything else to do, I found that I have no ability to make a decision of my own. Starting with scheduling. My life goes this way - first, my boss schedules my time (often a ridiculous amount, but I am more than happy to serve because I enjoy doing the things I get to do). Then I am limited to about four evenings (including weekends) that I have left. This is when my mom steps in and schedules her time with me, often equal to the four evenings. If, by some chance, this is not scheduled, the remaining time will go to my dad therefore leaving no time for me (and thus far, let me interject, no time to find the boyfriend that my family so desperately needs to have).

Then my mom found an ingenious way to save money for Christmas presents and decided to announce it at today's gathering. "I found these recipes for those jars where you give people all the layered ingredients and MG is going to make them for everyone." A surprised look on my cousin's face mislead me to believe that she was going to defend my adult status, but instead interjected, "You're going to allow her to make something? She can't cook (Ummm, there is no actual baking allowed in layering)." To which my lovely mother replied, "No, I'll probably buy all the ingredients and she'll assist me in making them." Hmm, perhaps it would be appropriate for me to make noodle necklaces for everyone instead? I could even dye the noodles (of course, I would need to be supervised).

Now, I know most of this is my fault since I allow this to happen. But let me rant one more thing - I CAN COOK. In fact, my skills do border on being semi-gourmet. People who have eaten my meals leave with full bellies also undeniably surprised that I could make such dishes and I can bake like there is no tomorrow. I have a killer cherry-devil's food recipe that makes most people melt with desire.

Hmm. Overlooking my latest posts perhaps I should momentarily change the name of this blog to "Rants in the City" instead of sex.

20 or so Jello Shots later

Yesterday was a golf outing in which we participate in. We came equipped with our duck pond and, of course, 300 CMYK jello shots.

Of course, the majority of golfers required a demonstration of how jello shots work, so my boss & I divided up the 34 participants into every other displays of tounge pushing, rotating madness. The only downside was that slice I got under my tounge from so many!

Great conversation

A friend of mine is going through a really hard time - yet said something unbelievably remarkable, that I had to share. Unfortunately, her husband has changed over their relationship and this is what she told him,

"You need to let me mourn the loss of you and learn if I like the person you are. Then make a valid decision if we should be together."

Genius.

Such glory in winning

Last night was a game I was dreading, our softball team was up against my old agency. I would like to believe I am on good terms with 80% of the agency, but the 20% I'm not are all on the softball league.

I was delighted when my boss's dog was along for the ride, it meant I'd be benched and could watch her. She did great, but she's an old pup and has been having shoulder and neck problems. She started aching and my boss walked her to her car, in the meantime I needed to go up to the plate and cover. I've never been so damn nervous. With three extra innings because we were tied, I shook hoping it would soon be over.

Bam! We hit a winning ball. It was the most awesome night ever! I love softball.

Thirteen Things I Probably Shouldn't Have Done This Week

1. Stayed out until midnight last night
2. While drinking, told the cute boy about the ex-fiance
3. Gone to my ex's bar and tipped WAY too much
4. Only got 3 hours of sleep because I was excited to go to the gym
5. Had all that caffine
6. While on my caffine high, jump over that barrier and smash my knee into the wall
7. Gotten so excited about meeting my sales, then losing a $2600 sale :(
8. Slept on my neck funny the last two nights
9. Jumped with joy when we beat my old agency at softball (I take that back, I was really happy I did that!)
10. Commited myself to so many events in the next two weeks
11. Tanned the last two mornings in a row - I think I burnt my boobs!
12. Decided that Slimfast was a good diet to go on right now - I need a sandwich!
13. Been too busy to post on this blog!


Links to other Thursday Thirteens!
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Get the Thursday Thirteen code here!


The purpose of the meme is to get to know everyone who participates a little bit better every Thursday. Visiting fellow Thirteeners is encouraged! If you participate, leave the link to your Thirteen in others comments. It’s easy, and fun! Be sure to update your Thirteen with links that are left for you, as well! I will link to everyone who participates and leaves a link to their 13 things. Trackbacks, pings, comment links accepted!

View More Thursday Thirteen Participants

Busy Girl

I had way too much caffine yesterday - like the kind of day when you can't focus because your veins are so happy and well caffinated. I was so pumped because I'm so close to hitting my numbers, in fact I would have hit my numbers had I not lost a $2600 sale. I cleaned my desk, I went through papers, I made phone calls. At 4:00 I crashed, but not before making an appointment at the gym.

My metabolism blows. Seriously, the only way for me to loose weight is to intake an unhealthy amount of calories (we're talking 500-600 calories) and be a pheen with exercise. In the meantime, my busy lifestyle and lack of income has meant no gym membership and excessive eating out and I've gained about 25 lbs.

So I went to my appointment at my old gym. To my dismay, the cute sales guy had left and I got a new girl. She offered a great deal - no contract, no enrollment fee and best of all, a discount because of my health insurance. My $75 membership was downed to $51 and includes unlimited tanning. I signed myself up!

I started on the strict counting calories and gym regiment this morning. I've never felt better. I'll be bikini ready by winter - but at least I'll be ready!

Oh - so much to recap

Bad blogger again. I'm a blog-aholic and when you can see there are no blogs I guess that means I'm really freaking busy so this blog may be a bit random and not storyline accurate, but it'll recap.

About two weeks ago I finished dog sitting, to celebrate I busted open a fabulous Italian vodka (a thank-you from their trip) and put on my fancy new shoes to get ready to go out. In the process, I proceeded downstairs to my apartment only to wipe out on my ass; therefore, breaking my tailbone (again - it happened to me as a waitress as well). I have been in pain since, but know that the only thing they can do is prescribe some really great drugs that I can't afford and offer me the "lovely" red donut to sit on until I heal. So in the meantime it's 12 advil a day (not doctor recommended). That's about it for the excitement.

My schedule has gotten so complicated the last few weeks that I went back to writing everything in my planner. That being said, as I was jotting down items I realized I often doubled and triple booked myself on regular occassions. For instance, my dear friend was coming in from New York on Wednesday night - misjudging the hours in the day I had a 4:00pm meeting with a new client, a 6:00 softball game followed by a cocktail and wings and then picking her up from the airport at 10. Thank goodness she flew in from La Guirda which meant her plane was delayed 1/2 an hour - I was able to pick her up in time. I had thought ahead and taken Thursday off, but then scheduled a seminar with potential clients that day and forgot about the big awards ceremony on Thursday night. She said she would love to go to the ceremony, so I promptly bought her a ticket. Wednesday night we enjoyed drinks at an old pub (her not me, I was on a diet coke only budget so I could cover her drinks) and then realized it was 2:30am. We headed home, I slept a couple hours and left for Pewaukee that morning.

After the seminar, we went shopping in the third ward and got changed for the awards show. After a quick change and some hair fluffing, we headed back downtown, picked up my boss and then went to the show. We puroused the entries only to find one of my old ads entered with my name on it! Happily, I anticipated finding out what I could have won. Our ad took home the silver nut! In excitement, we left, had a cocktail at our Thursday hang out and found our energy waining.

Not willing to let the night be over, we headed to Milwaukee's Safehouse, an entertaining bar with hidden passage ways and puzzle walls. After an hour or so there, we headed home.

I had taken the morning off on Friday, dropped my friend at her car, had a meeting, finished with work, and then decided to take a moment to unwind. An early bed time, but well needed rest.

Yesterday I anticipated doing much more, only to do much less. After driving all over Milwaukee and its suburbs, I finally found a couple hats my dad had wanted for father's day, I then had a cocktail by my mom, got a sinus headache and laid down for a minute - which turned into two hours. The dog I was sitting for showed up about 7:30, I walked her, played with her and was in bed by 9.

Today has been a very chill day - it's been pouring rain since early this morning so I've spent some much needed time at home. My head is still aching, so I took a bit of a nap and did some grocery shopping for my dad (after all - it's his day). Then I thought to myself - crap, I should really blog...

So that's the activities blog for me the past couple weeks. I also made a decision that since our payroll is a bit off (the second & fourth Fridays of every month) and this month is coming up to where we go three weeks without income, that I would finally get a credit card to tie me over. I was approved for a platinum card but asked for a low credit line so that I can make sure I can pay it off every month and not be tempted to buy things I don't need. It arrived yesterday. I also decided that I will get a gym membership this week. I have the gym in my apartment, but when faced with being at home and working out I opt to watch TV and relax. If I have a membership, at least when I get bored and want to do something, I'll head to the gym.

And that's about it!

I will hopefully be keeping up with blogging this week and actually participate in the Thursday Thirteen, as I've missed the last two ...

Big Freaking Babies

This is a little bit of a rant post.

Lately, I've covered a lot for an employee at work - this past week it's been a lot more than usual. Thursday was a call that she was running late, could I come in and set up? Sure. Friday it was that she wanted to leave early, could I stay late and work for her? I guess. Sunday she told me she was sick, but wasn't sure if she was going to call in - basically meaning, can you go in early just in case? So I went to work early.

Here's the problem. I work a job that is legitimately a 40 hour salary position. If you go over, you get comp time. I'm always over, meaning I always have comp time. This seems like a great thing, but they don't technically want you to work over because (a) you get burnt out and (b) you get bonus vacation days when you could be making sales. I hate comp time - I don't like not working, but I'm really asked to take it. That being said, that means eveytime I come in early to do another person's job, they are giving me vacation time. Would you want to give someone vacation time for a job that someone else is supposed to do? No.

Plus, it's an obvious sign of being taken advantage of. It doesn't matter what I have planned, it's assumed I'll cover and I've had it. Where's my return on investment? I'm also supposed to drop everything to take care of her needs right away. For instance, I was working on a quote and our specials board yesterday when the sick employee went on chat to have me help her with something. Great for her, being sick and trying to work but the conversation went like this:

Her: "Can you help me with something?"
MG: "Sure, but I'm busy right now so it'll have to wait."
Her: "Okay"
Her: "How long?"
Her: Just a bit later, "Are you there?"

So I drop what I'm doing to assist her immediately - in finding a book for another employee. Wouldn't it have made more sense for her to tell the person she was helping where the book was instead of using me?

Then this morning was the all too familiar, a person called for her (returning her call). "Oh just confirm it with her." Turns out it's not a confirmation at all - it was a confusing message about a class. I felt that I needed to take care of it but had no clue, so I did the best I could - all while trying to get my AM stuff done. I ended up arranging it wrong, but it could be easily remedied and I got it taken care of it.

So now I'm busy, trying to get work done when the following chat ensues (and this is pretty much verbatim, because I saved it):

Her: "Are you pissed at me or something?"
MG: "No, working."
Her: "Why are you being so short and rude to me?"
MG: "Because I'm trying to work and I don't like when someone calls for you and I have to take care of it while I'm trying to do follow ups and quotes." - That's right, who suddenly grew a backbone?
Her: "you didn't have to take care of it.. i could've done it"
Her: "why did you do it? i could have taken care of it"
MG: "because you said - just get her information"
Her: "no i didn't.. I SAID i was just calling to confirm. You were already picking up the phone anyways.. i'll remember that .."
MG: "miscommunication. Done and over with."
Her: "what you said was rude"
Her: "i won't ever ask you to do anything else for me.."

Now, I was going to reply, "Have you not noticed me covering your ass Thursday, Friday and yesterday?" But then I thought I wasn't going to get in a fight with a 20 year old.

I keep thinking if I was like this five years ago. I don't think I was. I love that the chat has threats in it "I'll remember that ..." Makes me want to scream, "Remember all the shit I do for you!"

GRR.

On a happy note ... my friend is coming in from New York tomorrow for a couple days! I'm so excited! I haven't seen her since I was in New York in November. She's also coming to an awards ceremony on Thursday night which will be great to have a friend tag along with!

So tomorrow will be a happy post!

Pet Owners

I have to post this email I received today because it's so true ...

My Dear Dogs and Cats,

The dishes with the paw prints are yours and contain your food. The other
dishes are mine and contain my food. Please note: Placing a paw print in
the middle of my plate does not stake a claim for it to become your dish
and food, nor do I find that aesthetically pleasing in the slightest!

The stairway was not designed by NASCAR and is not a racetrack. Beating
me to the bottom is not the object. Tripping me doesn't help because I
fall faster than you can run.

I cannot buy anything bigger than a king-sized bed. I am very sorry about
this. Do not think I will continue sleeping on the couch to ensure your
comfort. Dogs and cats can actually curl up in a ball when they sleep.
It is not necessary to sleep at right angles to each other, stretched out
to the fullest extent possible. I also know that sticking tails straight
out and having tongues hanging out at the other end to maximize space is
nothing but sarcasm.

For the last time, there is not a secret exit from the bathroom. If, by
some miracle, I beat you there and manage to get the door shut, it is not
necessary to claw, whine, meow, try to turn the knob, or get your paw
under the edge and try to pull the door open. I must exit through the
same door I entered. I have been using The bathroom for years - canine or
feline attendance is not mandatory.

The proper order is to kiss me, then go smell the other dog or cat's
butt. I cannot stress this enough!

And for Your comfort, my dear pets, I have posted the following message
on our Front door:

RULES FOR NON-PET OWNERS WHO VISIT AND MIGHT WANT TO COMPLAIN ABOUT MY
PETS

1. They live here; you don't.

2. If you don't want hair on your clothes, stay off the furniture. That's
why they call it "fur"niture.

3. I like my pets a lot better than I like some people. To you, it's an
animal. To me, he/she is an adopted son/daughter who is short, hairy,
walks on all fours, and does not speak clearly.

4. Finally, remember: Dogs and cats are better than kids because they Eat
less; don't ask for money all the time; are easier to train; Usually come
when called; never drive your car; don't hang out with Drug-using
friends; don't smoke or drink; don't worry about having to Buy the latest
fashions; don't wear your clothes; don't need a Gazillion dollars for
college; and if they get pregnant; you can sell their children.

So long, he's looking good.

I visited my friend last night while he was bartending, it was so sad that he looked so good and I even contemplated having sex with him. Thank god for dog sitting, as I promptly left the bar at a decent time for the 25 minute drive back.

Thirteen Words of Adviced You Should've Followed

This week I've been pondering words of wisdom that people have bestowed on me that I haven't always followed - how about you? Add your advice in comments as well as your link and I'll post them here (*Please put your website in the comments, it makes it a lot faster to update!)

1. Beer before liquor, you've never been sicker. Liquor before beer your in the clear.
2. If you eat the second piece of cake, it'll go straight to your hips.
3. You're too good for him.
4. Keep your friends close and your enemies closer.
5. Life isn't about money or love - it's about living.
6. Every family is dysfunctional.
7. Learn to change your tires - it makes you a strong woman.
8. No man wants his wife to be "gorgeous" he wants his wife to be beautiful - then it's character and not just looks.
9. Blood is thicker than water, but water tastes better.
10. Be yourself. If they don't like you -screw them.
11. The best cure for a hangover is to keep drinking!
12. No one has fond memories of high school.
13. And my favorite - Hos before bros.

Links to other Thursday Thirteens!
1. (leave your link in comments, I’ll add you here!)

Get the Thursday Thirteen code here!


The purpose of the meme is to get to know everyone who participates a little bit better every Thursday. Visiting fellow Thirteeners is encouraged! If you participate, leave the link to your Thirteen in others comments. It’s easy, and fun! Be sure to update your Thirteen with links that are left for you, as well! I will link to everyone who participates and leaves a link to their 13 things. Trackbacks, pings, comment links accepted!

View More Thursday Thirteen Participants

Strange

It's been a strange week and a half. Since I'm dog sitting, I'm going home, feeding, walking, playing, etc not out networking, drinking and what not. I officially know I'm not in the position to own a dog right now - there's too much to do after work, but the break has been nice.

Every day I go on two walks now, cuddle at night with two pups and I actually even get a chance to do laundry and pilates. It's amazing how much time two little guys can take up.

Today's a busy day. I have a meeting at 12, one at 1:30 and then a networking meeting at 5:30. I brought the dogs into work (thank god I can do that) so that they can still get attention and get walked, but even today my life will be enthrolled with their care. I completely sympathize with parents now (don't get me wrong - I realize a WHOLE different gammet there) and why they need to leave at certain times, take certain phone calls, go to certain doctor's appointments (check on the post from Thursday) and so on.

Oh Baby!

If you didn't hear both Gwen & Angelina had their babies this weekend, Kingston and Shiloh - they gave their kids actual names! Congrats to them!

My long weekend brought me back to work looking like a lobster and hurting too. I forgot what a bastard sun burn is!

For Charity & Other Happenings

Last night was a charity event for the YWCA - which included a bachelor's auction. The event was a "donation" of $25.00 which entered you into a raffle and got you a drink of choice and also allowed your name to be put on bachelor silent auction. 12 viable candidates walked around and schmoozed with the ladies, all trying to get the most money for their, ummm, "services" for one evening.

A bit in the tank - I bid on the cute guy at the door then downed a couple more beers and chatted with a couple friends. At 9:00 they started awarding Violent Femmes and Ben Folds tickets, one of our friends won two. Then the raffle and she won a spa gift certificate. The other girl that we were there with won golf tickets. A couple other people won the next random prizes and it was time to award the grand prize ... a custom tailored and designed outfit and called out the numbers. To my surprise, it was my ticket! Pumped, I gladly accepted the prize!

Then the bachelor winners were announced and it turns out my $25 bid actually won one of the guys. Some of the darling gentleman never got bid on at all. Lesson to all - silent bachelor auctions don't work.

In other happenings, I spent the night with the dogs at their house. The next day I packed them up and brought them back to my house. Hearing my voice, my happy cat wandered out to say hello. His beautiful white face was black. I grabbed him, panicked that he had gotten into my paint and tried to scrub his face to no avail. I then surveyed my supplies and saw that none of the paints or paintings had been struck. Angrily I picked him up and went next door to my sisters. I didn't even knock. She was having dinner with my dad and I strutted in and presented my once cutie pie cat to my family. I demanded to know what happened.

My dad laughed. Turned out during his kitty sitting, he was using a sharpie to which my cat was very attracted. Enjoying the smell, he rubbed his head against it - staining his fur black. My dad let this continue until he was happily stoned and permanently dyed.

That's not all of the fun animal stories. The youngest of the two dogs I'm puppy sitting for is wired at night and has been causing me to get around 3 hours of sleep. Not happy this morning, I took them on a walk - only to notice the older dog bleeding from her paw. I felt horrible. The week before, she broke her toe nail at the base, I rushed her to the vet. After saying it might be broken and other random could-be's it turns out it's just an infection - but I still feel like a horrible doggy-sitter.

On the rush to the vet I got a phone call which said this ...

"Hi this is 2002 from the other night at the bar. I met you last week, will be there this week and ... well wanted to cash in on that blow job."

Random rants in drunken stages that you think are funny and may have told his boss do not turn out to be good.

Thirteen Things that Surprised Me This Week

1. Random acts of kindness really do put you in the best mood ever.
2. Drunken rants get back to you ... see my post today.
3. My cat likes sharpies - and now he looks like an idiot.
4. Two little dogs take up a lot of room in bed.
5. Movie tickets are now $9.75 a piece.
6. $25.00 for charity gets you more than a good feeling.
7. Sunset Wheat is better than Blue Moon.
8. eBay is a good place to sell and buy good quality junk.
9. It's nice to see people fall in love, even when it's not you.
10. Taylor Hicks won American Idol.
11. My built-in retainer broke while still glued to my teeth. Guess I should've gotten removed 5 years ago.
12. Dog cookies taste like people cookies.
13. How time flies ...

And in the thirteenth hour ...

In the 13th hour, I'm exhausted and the day may be over but not the week.

So here I am, at the beautiful house I'm sitting the dogs at, on the comfy chair, watching Tivo-ed House, with my laptop on my lap. My mind is still at work, going a random 30 miles an hour - jumping from sales, to testimonials, to anticipation over what my students will say tomorrow at lunch for my "review."

It's been almost two years since I was in college, anticipating the review of classes and here I am nervous over what they will say. I must admit, this hasn't been my finest hour as a mentor. Between the job change and the hours change, I haven't been as accessible as I usually am. I even got the flu and slept through a meeting. After talking with former students they suggested that I'm too accessible, no longer making me a mentor but a companion. While this is good for connection's sake, it is not good for viewing me as a professional. Other mentors request that students meet them during business hours, at their offices and at their convenience. For me it's after hours, weekends, it's traveling out of my range. 1/2 way into the semester I actually became a professional but I started off not as one which can't be good for a review. It's funny how three students, will make or break my day.

That is my over-tired rant of the evening. Now it's one last run with the dogs and to bed I go!

Much Over Due ...

Fair warning this post will be long. I've been so busy I haven't been able to post so I'll cram my week happenings into this little blog.

On Wednesday I had my deposition in the morning, or what I would like to call - the worst hour and a half of my life. Turns out that lawyers don't like it when you tell them that the first thing the client said to you was that they were going to sue you - especially when they actually are. After two thousand questions about sidewalk construction, my lack of memory of last names over three years and being asked the whereabouts of employees that no longer worked there, my nerves were frazzled. Turns out the guy is suing about five people, so there were approximately 8 lawyers in the conference room - all of which felt at one point or another that a question needed objection or that I was being badgered.

Here's the deal with the depositions - it's not like the court of law where someone says "objection" and you don't answer - no, you still have to answer. This is also included with "Objection! Badering the witness!" I answered the same five questions over and over again. Could I remember verbatim what I said? No, not verbatim. I also WAY over used the phrase "to my recollection." Yipes.

So I didn't have a very productive afternoon after that - and my frazzled nerves were not up to playing softball. Thank goodness I live in Wisconsin. The beautiful morning turned into rain and HAIL. That's right, hail. They promptly cancelled our game and it was my understanding that my old job owed me a free beer - or six.

After work I sat at the bar by myself, downed a couple Berry Weises and then my boss joined me for dinner. We closed the restaurant and I can officially say that I had been WAY over served. But I wasn't done yet. We headed over to the 1850, dressed in grubby clothes and enjoyed some more alcholic beverages.

About an hour into the evening, a girl came up to me - advised me she was not a lesbian, but wanted to know if I was single. I said yes, she said her friend was interested. I was exhausted and drunk and didn't want to play the cute-girl-flirt game so I bought him a beer (hindsight - that encourages conversation) and thought that would call it the night. Turned to conversate with my friends and was informed he was standing behind me.

After awhile of conversation, we found out we attended the same school (note - this conversation has never worked well for me - so I don't know why this time was any different). Now, the first time this came about was when I was 21 and had tried to have a one night stand. The next morning we found out we went to the high school - only he graduated 10 years before me. This time was the opposite - he graduated in 2002. When he asked me when I graduated, I informed him that there was actually 9s involved in my date and left it as is.

Now, I've drank enough that everything out of my mouth is hilarious and I'm no longer speaking to be serious - just to be funny. A friend and I ducked out to the bathroom, occuppied by two other ladies and had a conversation about my encounter.

B: "What do you think of him?"
MG:"Not my type."
B: "But he's nice."
MG: "I'd give him a blow job but that's about it ..."

The older lady looked at me, I thought she might know him and I really wasn't being serious - it just sounded like something funny to say. After realizing that she probably didn't - I went back out to continue conversations with him.

About 1/2 an hour later, he grabbed two ladies walking back saying he wanted to introduce me to his boss ... that's right. His boss. Also the ladies who were in the bathroom. The ladies that heard me say I'd give him a blow job. Eeek.

It was at this time that I was sobering up and decided to head out. The girls behind me grabbed me and asked if either of the guys I was with was my boyfriend - I informed her "no." She said, "Great - my friend thinks you're hot ..."

STOP. Twice in one night? Huh? I left before I met him, it was a bit of overload for me. I went to bed.

On Thursday we had a large networking event to attend to. Also attending was the cute boy who works at one of our referrals. A night of harmless flirting ended up with a successful event toast and celebration. Where I found out he has a girlfriend who is from another country (like an ocean-seperated country) and they live together. She's a bit over zealous and he's looking forward to a female-less summer when she goes home. I thought to myself, "An 8 week in ..." That is horrible - I know it is. I was the girlfriend that had girls think about that to my boyfriend. But the thought did cross my mind - several times, including this morning.

On Friday I went home and went to bed.

On Saturday I went craft shopping with a friend from work who is getting married. We headed back to my place and promptly made about 8 different versions of invitations - it was a ton of fun. I haven't arts & crafted in awhile. Then headed over to another friend from work's house where I am dog sitting, got the tour and enjoyed a couple mojitos.

On Sunday I had breakfast with the family, did some laundry, ate dinner with the family and had a girl's night Desperate Housewives party.

That brings me back to today! Today I've been trying to do as many random acts of kidness as humanly possible - I thought it would be a great Thursday Thirteen.